Saturday, November 18, 2006

20 FAQs about our Organization, PATH:

1. Our weapon of choice: patpath
2. How we aim our weapon: sipath
3. Our preferred terrain: pathag
4. Our mode of reconnaissance: pathrol
5. What we say when it's enough: sapath
6.What ought to be for us: dapath
7. Our footwear: sapathos
8. Our gaskette: sapathilla
9. Our average physique: pathpatin
10.Our paradigm shift: lipath
11. A sure fit: lapath
12. Our favorite soup: lapath bathchoy
13. Our favorite merienda: patupath
14. Our desired virtue: tapath
15. When we can't bargain anymore: tapath na
16. The number of friends we have: apath
17. The number of enemies we have: apathnapu't apath
18. Our feared carnivore: pathing
19. Our mischievous side: pathaway
20. What happens to us when we don't stop this nonsense: pathay

Kayo, dear readers, may maidadagdag pa ba rito sa listahan? Gusto 'nyo ba itong...hmm, pathulan?

-- Bobby G

New words


The Washington Post's Style Invitational asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition. These were some of the best:

* Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.
* Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.
* Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.
* Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.

The Post also ran a contest that produced these daffynitions:

* Balderdash: a rapidly receding hairline.
* Coffee : a person who is coughed upon.
* Flabbergasted: appalled over how much weight you have gained.
* Gargoyle: an olive-flavored mouthwash.
* Flatulence: the emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over by a steamroller
* Negligent: a condition in which you absent-mindedly answer the door in your nightgown.
* Oyster : a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddish expressions.
* Pokemon: a Jamaican proctologist.
* Rectitude : the formal, dignified demeanor assumed by a proctologist immediately before he examines you.
* Testicle: a humorous question on an exam.

Non-English phrases
The Globe & Mail's Globe Challenge asked readers to add a letter to a non-English expression and redefine it. Some gems:

* Stout le monde: Is everyone getting fatter these days?
* Tour de forcep: a long and difficult birth
* Inter alias: among other false names
* Smuchas gracias: thanks for the kisses
* Chile con carnet: permission to emigrate
* Armor vincit omnia: Tanks beat everything
* Patter familias: I recognize your footsteps
* Coupe d'├ętat: government limo
* Tubermensch: Mr. PotatoHead
* In vino verbitas: Drunks talk too much
* Souse-chef: cooking with alcohol